Save Me Read online

Page 18

“I know...Raj, don’t you see? We are not to blame here. It just happened. It is not your fault and it is not mine,” Shannon said softly.

  “But why do our marriage have to end? We can work something out,” Raj said as he tried to find a solution to the horrible situation. “Come home with me...and you can still be with Arien. We have so much experience with sharing each that this is an easy fix for us.”

  “I can still be with her?”

  “Of course,” Raj said holding on to Shannon’s shoulder. “If it is too difficult to watch me with her then do the separation. We continue our marriage and you can be with Arien whenever you want. This would be like it was before when we could be with whomever we wanted, except now, it would just be with one other person. I am fine with that.”

  I could see Shannon considering the offer, and I was horrified that she would even think about it. She turned to me and held my hands.

  “What do you think? Do you think we could try that?” Shannon asked as she bit her lower lip.

  “It’s up to you, honey. Whatever you want,” I said with a smile because I did not want Raj to feel that I was forcing Shannon. I wanted her to make the decision that she wanted only me.

  Shannon searched my eyes, and she must have seen that I was on the verge of death because she turned back to Raj and told him she made a decision.

  “Raj, it would not be fair to Arien that I am home with you while she is here in bed alone…”

  “But you can spend some nights with her.”

  “But when I am not with her, I'm home making love to you. That’s not right. That’s not the love I have for her, Raj. I want her completely, and I want her to have me completely. If I'm with you then she is free to have whoever she wants, and I don’t want to share her.”

  “But you had no problems sharing me,” he said and walked away from her.

  “Raj, I’m sorry,” Shannon said. “I care about you and I didn’t want to do this to you, but I feel like I don’t have a choice.”

  “You have one but you are choosing not to take it. I picked you up off the ground, and I've loved you and did whatever you wanted to make you happy and this is how you do me, Shannon? Fine. I'm filing for divorce and you're not getting anything from me…”

  “I don’t want anything, honey. I just want to be with Arien. You can have it all. You saw how depressed I became. I don’t want to live like that for the rest of my life, so I am willing to give it all up just to be free.”

  Raj had no comeback. He was shocked that Shannon was willing to walk away with nothing in order to be with me. He thought she was going to fight for what she rightfully deserved, but that was not the case, so he was completely disarmed. Raj just stood there looking from me to her, and the silence was unbearable.

  “You really love her that much?” Raj asked.

  “Yes, I do,” Shannon replied without hesitation.

  Raj made a loud sigh.

  “OK. Well, we can wrap this up quickly. I will have the divorce papers ready for you in a couple of days. I will cancel your credit cards, and you have one access to the house to get your things…”

  “I’m not going back there so you can throw everything out. I took my jewelry and my documents, so it’s OK.”

  “I’m not throwing your things out, Shannon. I will see to it that you get them,” he said softly, his anger fading as reality set in that there was no way back for Shannon.

  “Thank you.”

  “I wish you both all the best. It will be hard for me at first, but I’ll be fine,” Raj said to Shannon then turned to me. “As for you, I wish someone comes along and takes her away from you so that you could feel exactly how you make me feel.”

  Raj walked to the door and never looked back. I jumped at the slamming of the door, and the silence that followed was painful. Shannon fell onto the sofa and covered her head with a cushion. I was not sure if she was crying or not, but I was trying to shake the nerves that were damaged from what had just transpired. I needed to calm down to fully absorb the fact that Shannon was here and she was mine.

  Shannon finally sat up, and I was relieved to see that she wasn’t crying. She held out her hand for me to rejoin her on the sofa, but I walked away.

  “Hey, hey, hey…,” she got up and ran to me as I was taking a teacup from the cupboard. “What’s...what’s wrong?”

  “Take your fucking hands off me, Shannon!”

  “Ari...what’s going on? Why are you upset?”

  I reached for three menus and slammed them down on the counter.

  “Here. Order food if you want, if not, there’s plenty in the fridge. I’m making a cup of tea and going to bed. Excuse me,” I said and pushed past her to the other side of the kitchen.

  “Arien...talk to me.”

  “I could not believe that you would turn to me and ask if I would be OK with you going back home with Raj! Since the moment we met, you being with Raj has been our number one fight, so how the fuck you thought that would be OK is beyond me!”

  “I’m sorry...I wouldn’t have done it…”

  “Because you saw how hurt I was at the suggestion.”

  “You were smiling.”

  “You knew that was not real. I just wanted him to see that this was something you were doing willingly.”

  “I know, Ari,” she said calmly. “Everything was so awful, and I was just trying to find a way that would make everyone happy, but I realized that someone had to get hurt because I could not do what he suggested.”

  “What if I had said yes?”

  “You said yes.”

  “And I meant it?”

  “I still would not have done it. You were standing there when I explained to him why that would not be OK with me. Arien, please do not let us fight and…,” she said and stopped when she saw me walking away. “Arien, please!”

  I went into the bedroom and removed my clothes then slipped under the covers because I was too angry to get pajamas. I expected her to rush in after me but she didn’t, and I wondered what she was doing out there. Maybe she was texting her husband to say what a mistake she made. No. Her phone was on the chest of drawers. I turned my back to what would be her side of the bed, and I was angry that our first night together was starting out this way, but Shannon had to understand that her hesitation in making it clear to Raj that she wanted to be with me, was not something I could ever be happy about.

  Shannon entered the room and came to my side of the bed with a cup of tea in her hand.

  “Baby, I brought your tea. Can you just take a few sips?”

  “I don’t want it.”

  “Please,” she begged and I sat up in bed with the sheets over my breasts.

  She handed me the cup and I was grateful for the warm liquid that soothed me. I looked into her eyes, and I saw that she too was hurting from this whole situation, in addition to the mountain of guilt she carried. I wanted to make her life better, and I was feeling worried about whether I could. Raj tried by doing whatever she wanted, and he failed. I was worried that it would be the same with me. It was his last wish before he left my apartment and I prayed that it would never come true.

  “Did you order something to eat?” I asked.

  “I found something in the fridge and I have made us a plate. You must be starving. I am. Please have dinner with me,” Shannon begged, and after a slight hesitation, I handed her the cup and came from under the covers.

  “Oh shit. Maybe I should have just joined you in bed,” she said when she realized that I was naked.

  “Sex is the last thing on my mind right now, Shannon. I don’t know how it could be on yours,” I said as I slipped into a pair of shorts and a top.

  “You’re beautiful, babe. No matter what my emotional or mental state is, I will always react to you being naked,” she smiled at me to try to break the tension between us.

  “I think we should eat,” I said and went into the kitchen to see that the dining table was set and the food was being warmed up in the microwave. “Wh
at did you find?”

  “It looks like a vegetable casserole. There is also another container of riblets in some kind of sauce…”

  “I love that,” I said and started to help Shannon put our meal together. “Claire is my housekeeper. You’ll love her. She’s the best. I hardly ever see her, but my meals are always prepared and my apartment is always clean. I don’t know how she does it.”

  “My housekeeper will be happy to find out that I’m gone. That woman has probably witnessed more sex than any other housekeeper, real or imagined. What she hadn’t seen, she definitely heard.”

  “The same would have happened to Claire, but she doesn’t live with me.”

  We sat at the table and began eating our meals. Shannon was trying to stay focused on us and not allowing her mind to stray to what was going on with Raj, but I could read her very well and knew that she was just trying to put her best face forward so that I would not think she was having regrets. However, I understood totally that the transition would take some time.

  “Are you OK?” I asked as I ate.

  “Yes. I’m just…I’m OK,” she said, changing her mind about saying how she was truly feeling.

  “Shan, I don’t want you to hold anything in. I want us to be free to express ourselves. Whatever it is, we can talk it through.”

  “I know. I’m just trying...I just don’t want you to think that I'm not sure about the decision I made. I have spent a long time trying all the ways to stay with Raj, not because I didn’t want to be with you, but because I didn’t want to end my marriage and hurt him. The fact that I left meant that no other option would work,” she explained.

  “I understand, babe. I know this will take some time and you are going to think about him for a while. It’s OK. Just be honest with me about it, OK?”

  “I promise,” she said and whatever anger or uncertainty that was inside me, slowly lifted and I could smile again.

  “You’re with me. We are going to sleep together in each other’s arms and I’m gonna wake up with you beside me. How awesome is that?” I said, smiling from ear to ear.

  “What is more awesome is that you are my girlfriend. Officially. Holy shit! I’m having a hard time believing this right now.”

  “I know!” I exhaled first then took a deep breath then released again. “There is so much to do and learn about each other. I'm really excited and lucky to have found you, Shannon. You have changed my whole life without even trying.”

  “Imagine when I start to try,” she winked at me and put a spoonful in her mouth.

  “What about what Raj said?” I asked softly and the smile left my lips.

  “What?”

  “He said he wished someone would take you away from me…”

  “Stop that nonsense right now. Raj is hurting, so he is going to say shit. He doesn’t know what is happening inside me. He can’t see how I’m truly feeling,” she said and put down her fork. “Look at me, Arien. I'm going to say this only once, and I want you to believe me. I loved Raj with all my heart. He was everything I wished a husband could be and more. He has never told me no, and I believed he was the best thing to have happened to me. If I left that angel of a man for you, then who the fuck could make me leave you for them? It's impossible. It's not just because I love you why I am here with you. I am here because I could not breathe without you, literally. I was breathing in a paper bag multiple times per day because it was difficult to catch my breath when I realized that we could not be together. I was slowly dying each day, Arien, and that’s why I left it all behind to be here.”

  I wiped the tears from my eyes and went to her at the other side of the table. I pulled her chair out and sat across her lap then wrapped my arms around her neck. I took her soft, exotic lips into mine in a kiss that told her how comforting and exhilarating her words were to me. Her hand came under my top and caressed my back as our tongues explored each other’s mouth. It was almost impossible to believe that this was not a dream. Shannon was here with me in my apartment...in our apartment. I smiled at the thought as we kissed, my heart bursting with happiness and I hoped that my parents would feel the same about her. I would have to tell them first thing tomorrow, and I was sure it would be worse than Shannon breaking the new to Raj. Oh my God!

  Chapter 17

  Just as I thought, waking up in Shannon’s arms was the best thing to have happened to me. The feel of her soft, feminine body against mine was so amazing that I wondered how I had ever been with a man. It felt right, like this was where I belonged my whole adult life. I was exhausted from our lovemaking last night and there was no one who could eat pussy better than this woman. Oh fuck! I lost count of how many times she made me cum, and I could feel the effects of it now. I was bound to fall asleep in that very important meeting that awaited me this morning.

  I glanced over at the clock and realized it was time for me to get up. I had to get ready soon because I did not want my executives to be waiting when some of them had to catch flights to return home.

  “What time do you have to leave?” Shannon’s sweet voice said and I went up on one elbow so I could look at her face.

  “Good morning, my love,” I greeted with a kiss.

  “Oh my God. Say that again,” Shannon said into my mouth.

  “Good morning, my love.”

  “Ah! My heart!” she shouted and rolled over on top of me. “Fuck me before you go.”

  “What? Are you crazy? Get off!” I pushed Shannon off me and sat up in bed. “Listen, I have a very important meeting this morning, and I need to talk to my parents about you. That will not go well…”

  “Why?”

  “I have never been in a relationship before, and they're already speculating that I’m in love and that’s the reason for my drastic change. They, however, think that it’s a man.”

  “Yikes.”

  “You don’t understand these people. They are obsessed with my life, and I have been successful at shutting them out, but I won’t be able to anymore,” I said and reached for my bag. I took out one of my credit cards and placed it on the night table. “Here. Get yourself some clothes and whatever else…”

  “What? No. This is my first day with you...I don’t want you to leave me.”

  “What do you mean? Do you want to come to the office with me?”

  “Yes.”

  “But I will be in a meeting for at least two hours.”

  “I’ll wait in your office. I just want to be there with you,” she said and the look on her face made it impossible for me to say no.

  “OK. I’m going to shower while you pick out something to wear then you go in and I’ll do the same. We have to hurry, babe,” I said.

  “OK,” Shannon replied as I walked to the bathroom.

  I was having a hard time believing that my life could have changed so drastically. I thought of my friends who no longer wanted anything to do with me and wondered what they would think if they knew that I had a stable girlfriend. I would have lost them at girlfriend because they had known me to only have guys. I could not believe it either. As I hurried with my shower, I thought of breakfast for Shannon, but we could eat at my office so I was not worried about that. The crazy part of this was that I could no longer just think about myself because I had someone else in my life that I had to be mindful of. And it felt great!

  I came out of the bathroom and Shannon ran in. I saw that she laid out a beautiful, expensive dress that would make her look like one of the executives at the meeting. I smiled because I wanted her to make a good impression on my parents as I told them about my girlfriend. I got dressed in my usual pants and long sleeves with ruffles along the V-line. I had a matching jacket for my pants but chose not to wear it, but I would take it along. I brushed my hair in a ponytail because it made me look the cleanest in my business attire, and I put in pearl earrings to complete the look.

  As I closed my jewelry box, I saw a beautiful diamond eternity band that belonged to Shannon, and I realized that she had removed it a
s a symbol of an end to her marriage. A sudden sadness came over me, and I felt a little guilty that if I had not gone to her house, she and Raj would still be together. I closed the lid and turned to see Shannon looking at me.

  “Don’t blame yourself for this. We are not responsible for who we fall in love with,” she said.

  “I know.”

  “You are crazy beautiful, Arien. I don’t understand how you could be single all this time just waiting on me to come along. This whole thing is just crazy.”

  “I guess we were meant to be,” I said and put on my makeup while I waited for her to get dressed.

  I turned to look at Shannon as she zipped up the front of the red dress.

  “Stop it!” I shouted when I saw how absolutely breathtaking she was. “You take that dress off right now!”

  “You are making me blush. You're going to ruin my makeup, honey,” she laughed and walked past me to the dressing table.

  She took out her makeup bag and didn’t do much to look like a runway model.

  “I can’t,” I said and threw my hands up then slipped my shoes on. “It’s impossible that I get to have you as my very own. Listen, we are going to have problems. I'm going to be overprotective of you because I will not stand idly by and…”

  “Oooo...so I have a sexy badass girlfriend?” Shannon said and pulled me to her.

  “Stop...oh my God...stop! Let’s go. We’re late,” I said pulling away from her.

  Shannon chuckled as she released me, and I was happy to hear even a smidgen of happiness from her because it must be hard for her to make this transition. I knew I had to be patient and give her some time to completely let go of the life she knew and start a new one with me.

  “What about breakfast? Should I drive my car and get us both something?” she asked.

  “No. I’ll arrange something when we get to the office.”

  “But what if you don't have time?”

  “Then you take my car and go get it,” I replied as I picked up my bag and headed to the door.

  “You would let me drive your car?” Shannon asked.

  I turned to face her, closed the door that I had opened, and leaned against it. I reached for her and pulled her so she pressed against me.