The Business Trip Page 6

  “Alison...if you leave me, I will be destroyed. Please don’t leave me…”

  “Then save us both. Tell me right now that you are choosing me. You can come see your daughter whenever you want. You can partner with me in my business...it would be our business. I have it all waiting for you in New York so choose me right now.”

  “Just let me go talk to Sydney...please.”

  “No! I am not stupid. You make the decision right now and if you choose me, you go home and tell her that you fell in love with someone else and you are leaving. Make arrangements for your daughter and stop using her as a reason to keep everything the way you like. I will wait in this hotel a week if that is what it will take for you to sort this out and come back to New York with me but if I leave here without you right now, it is over,” she said uncompromisingly. My heart was beating wildly and my palm was sweaty. “So what is it going to be?”

  How could I look in the eyes of this beautiful, successful, amazing woman, who loves me with every fiber in her, who dictates the pace of my heart...how do I look and her and tell her that I will not choose to spend the rest of my life with her. I couldn’t do it. Despite all I stood to lose, I could not do it.

  “I choose you.”

  She stood for a while because she did not expect that I would have made a decision. We have had countless discussions and fights over this and it always ended in an indecision but now she gave me an ultimatum and there was no other choice I could have made but to keep her in my life.

  “Say it again...I want to make sure I heard you right.”

  “I chose you, Alison. I won’t be able to survive without you so I choose you.”

  “Baby…,” she cried. “Baby!” She threw herself in my arms and kissed me.

  We were back out of our clothes and ravaging each other. I blocked out my own thoughts at the possibility that I have just made a devastating mistake because there was a major possibility that I could go home and after talking with Sydney, I will not be able to leave my family behind. I would then have to come back to this hotel room and tell the woman that I love that we could no longer be together. That would be unforgivable so now I found myself in a worse position than I was before.

  CHAPTER 5

  I woke up still wrapped in Alison’s arms and the sun was streaming through whatever little opening it could find. I turned to look at the clock and it was almost ten thirty. Alison needed to get breakfast and I needed to get going because I had to have this unpleasant talk with my wife and that could take a while to come to a decision, which I already told Alison that I made.

  I tried to untangle myself from Alison but she woke up and had questions.

  “Babe, are you going now to tell her about us?”

  “That’s the plan,” I smiled and brushed her hair from her face.

  Her eyes lit up then got glossy then got teary.

  “You chose me,” she said.

  “I did,” I replied unconvincingly but she held on to that hope. “I have a favor to ask.”

  “Sure. What is it?”

  “I don’t want you hanging out in a hotel room waiting on me to close my office, sort out my staff, get my stuff from home, sensitize my daughter, things like that. So go back to New York and I will meet you there.”

  “No! No, Logan!” She cried. “I am not leaving here without you!”

  “Alison! Please!” I shouted and got off the bed. “I told you I choose you so I don’t understand the reason for you to not trust me. I will come to you in New York.”

  “When should I expect you?” I opened my mouth but I did not know how long it will take to complete everything. “I am giving you two weeks from today, so the week after next Saturday, I will pick you of at JFK. Right?”

  “Two weeks will be enough.”

  “OK. Take me to the airport. I will bury myself in work so that I do not get too anxious then I make plans for your arrival. OK?”

  “OK,” I said and started packing up my things to go home.

  When we were set and ready to go, I looked at her and I had to rub my chest because of the stinging pain that had made its way from my heart to the surface. I looked at her beautiful face and knew how much I loved her and the truth was I might not see her again. I wanted to be with her badly but after my talk with Sydney, it may not turn out the way I hoped.

  I held her hand and thread my fingers through hers, looking at how well they fit with mine. I brought her hands up to my lips and kissed her knuckles. I caressed her face and I fought as hard as hell to not cry or not let her see how scared I was as the possibility of not seeing her again.

  “Logan? I see you in two weeks?”

  “You will see me in two weeks but I miss you already.”

  “I miss you too, babe,” she said and kissed me sweetly. “Come on. Let’s go.”

  I pulled my carry-on along the hallway toward the elevator and with every step it vibrated in my head because of the throbbing headache I was having. In the elevator, we did not speak nor when we exited. I drove for half the journey when I called my friend Erika to pick up Taila for me because I needed some alone time with Sydney. Alison was encouraged by that first step and I could hear her take a deep breath then released it with a sigh.

  “Why are you so quiet?” She asked me.

  “You know why. I hate being away from you.”

  “You could pop in before the time is up.”

  “Great idea, honey!” I lit up. “Why didn’t you make that suggestion before?”

  Alison started laughing and I was excited that we would be parting in a better mood than we left the hotel.

  “We should have thought about that instead of being all gloomy as if there was no way to see each other again. Logan?”

  “Yes, honey.”

  “I know it is scary and I know it is hard but I promise you that for the rest of my life, I will prove to you that it was all worth it because I will forever make you happy.”

  “I have no doubt. You are worth risking it all. I love you so much,” I said, meaning every word.

  I dropped Alison off at the airport and our kiss was passionate and sad. I held her face and took one last look, drinking in her features and memorizing every inch of it, tattooing her in my memory. I did it not because I was sure that I wouldn’t see her again but because the same reason that caused me not to make a choice for the past year still existed and I was not sure of anything until I speak with Sydney.

  +++

  I drove home alone, missing Alison so much that I kept looking at the passenger seat to see if she was really gone. She promised to call when she got home and I could not wait to hear her voice. I loved her and missed her so much that it was painful to not have her by my side.

  I opened the garage and noticed that Sydney’s silver BMW was missing which meant she was not at home. Maybe gone to have breakfast with her lover. Fuck! I went inside and headed straight to the bathroom to shower and take my focus from the hotel room and from Alison. The latter was harder to do but I was home now and there were about to be major changes to our lives. My parents will disown me along with the other members of my family and it made me wonder at what price did love cost too much.

  No one understood like Alison and I did, the depth of our bond. She was made for me and I am prepared to accept their hate to be with her but I could not accept the hurt that my absence would cause my child. It was not as if I was in an unbearable marriage and Taila would have to suffer a little in order to make us better parents for her. That was not the case at all because Alison and I fought more than Sydney and I did. As a matter of fact, we never had a fight in six years because she was always so calm and if the situation was about to get heated she would take control of it and bring the conversation back to a civil and calm discussion, which worked better for us because that enabled us to understand where each other was coming from. That was one of the reasons why it was hard for me to make a decision to leave a family that was not a problem to me.

  I step
ped out of the shower and got dressed then went to the kitchen to have some breakfast and that was when I realized that Alison had not eaten. I was sure though that she would get a cup of coffee and a croissant or something like that at the airport.

  As I drank my coffee I heard the door to the dining room opened and I knew that Sydney was here. She brought in a bag of grocery and put it on the counter in the kitchen.

  “Hey, babe. Aren’t you still going to New York?” She asked before coming over and giving me a kiss on my lips.

  “I canceled my meeting.”

  “Why?”

  “Because we need to talk. Where is Taila?”

  “Erika said she was coming to get her but I was running to the store so I dropped her off,” Sydney said and kept packing out the grocery.

  I waited for her to finish so that I could start this very important discussion. Finally, she was finished and washed her hands then took a seat opposite me.

  “I am taking the day off on Tuesday because we have an appointment with Dr. Brooks. She will be doing some tests to see if you are fine to start the procedure and I am really excited about us expanding our family…”

  “Are you having an affair with Sylvia?”

  The question shook her but I could not understand why because she must have known that this was going to come up especially when I saw them the other night.

  “No...I am not.”

  “I do not want to have this discussion based on lies, Sydney. We have had excellent communication over the six years we have been together. Please let us keep it that way,” I said in a tight serious tone so she understood the nature of this discussion. “I am going to ask you again. Are you having an affair with Sylvia?”

  “No...I am not,” she said then whispered. “Not anymore.”

  “So you had an affair but you broke it off?”

  “Yes.”

  Fuck! It hurt more coming from her lips. I felt like screaming and breaking everything in sight! But Sydney set a precedent and that was not how we communicated.

  “When did you break it off?”

  “Last night.”

  “When I saw her crying?”

  “Yes,” she said and her lower lip which started to tremble and the tears started to gather in her eyes.

  “Why did you end it?”

  “Because you found out.”

  “How did you know I found out?”

  Now, the tears were falling from her face.

  “She told me that you knew something based on your meeting and she spoke about the necklace. W-when…,” she had to pause to get control over her ability to speak because she was crying so much, “when you came home, I could tell from the look on your face.”

  “Do you love her?”

  “Somewhat...not like I love you.”

  “Well that makes me feel better,” I said sarcastically and I just wanted to scream at her but knew that I was not in a position to react that way.

  “I am really sorry, Logan. It will never happen again. I promise.”

  “Are you attracted to her?”

  She waited a while then answered. “Yes. But it is something that I can control...people are attracted to others all the time but it doesn’t mean that they sleep with them all...so...and it is not something to destroy your family over. It is just a thing that happens but if you need to put an end to…”

  “Sydney,” she stopped and looked at me still scared of the direction this conversation will take. “Is Sylvia the only person you have slept with since we have been together?”

  “Logan...I love you and these women mean nothing to me…”

  “Women?”

  “Only one other,” she started twisting her fingers.

  “Who?” What the fuck is this?! I can’t believe this shit I am hearing!

  “A professor at work.”

  “Is that current?”

  “Yes,” she cried.

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” I asked in astonishment. “So because I did not find out about that one, you didn’t bother to end it.”

  “I will end it. I will go to her and I will end it today…”

  “Sydney, we are always having sex so how did you find the need to have three women? Am I not satisfying you?”

  “Of course you are! It is not like that. At work...Julie is there, when I go to pick up Tai, Sylvia is there, at home you are here so I do not confuse them so they have nothing to do with you.”

  “You know, you had an affair with me while you were living with your girlfriend. You are a fucking notorious cheater!” Everything was falling apart. “Do you love Julie?”

  “No...it is nothing serious.”

  “Where do you have sex?”

  “With Julie?”

  “Yes Sydney! With fucking Julie. Where do you have sex?”

  “In our offices or at her house.”

  “Have you ever taken her here?”

  “No.”

  “What about Sylvia? Where?”

  “Here.”

  “In our fucking bed?!”

  “No!” she shouted with a tone I had never heard before. “Baby, please. We don’t have to shout. We can hear each other and provide all the answers without yelling.”

  “You took your lover into our home? With our daughter here?” I asked and she closed her eyes and held down her head. “You did this when I am away on business or I am at the office?”

  “Only when you are away on business or when you are in New York with her.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  She laughed through the tears. “You think I didn’t know about Alison?”

  Oh my God! Oh my God! I was stunned into silence.

  “You didn’t say anything.”

  “No. I didn’t. I was scared of losing you and my family to her because I know how you feel about each other so I pretended that it didn’t exist and to help me deal with it, I found my own fun so that I feel just as guilty.”

  “You cheated because of me?” I asked with barely a whisper.

  “Yes.”

  “How did you find out?”

  “I checked your phone when you were so depressed at one point. You did not want to leave us but you wanted to be with her and she was pressuring you to make a decision. I know it all, Logan.”

  “My phone has a lock. How did you get in?”

  “That was not hard to guess because I knew it would be something to do with Taila. It took a few tries but I got in.”

  “How long have you known?”

  “About seven months ago,” she said shaking her head in disappointment. “I didn’t want to say anything and just left you with your conscience to decide but you caught Sylvia and I so I had to let you know so that you didn’t think I intentionally disrespected our wedding vows. I am sorry. It was the wrong way to go about it but I felt like it was the only way to deal with it.”

  I now started to cry because the world was closing in around me and I had no idea how to stop it. I had to just get everything out and hope that we can come to some agreement on how to proceed with our lives.

  “I love you, Sydney, and I love our daughter and the life we have together…”

  “I know you do.”

  “But...I feel like I have found my soulmate in Alison. You are a good wife and a good mother and that made it hard for me to leave. This thing has been eating me alive for a year now and I knew that the only person who could help me sort through my confusion is you, but how do I come to you with something like this?”

  “You couldn’t.”

  “I know. We have to sort this out though because I don’t want to leave my family and...the thought of someone else touching you is making me sick. You are my wife, Sydney! Why didn’t you come to me instead of fucking cheating on me with these women? Oh God!”

  “You may want to dial back on your anger a bit. I have been living for months with the knowledge that my wife is in love with another woman and considering leaving me. That is what being sick feel
s like. I have been living in fear everyday for seven months and I notice the change in you and how late you come home because you have to talk to her out of my earshot while your daughter is here waiting for you to tuck her in. She is not used to this because before Alison, you never missed a night unless you were away on real business.”