Save Me Read online

  “Don’t get started without me,” he joked and walked away.

  Shannon came over to me and pulled a chair so she could be seated close to me. We had very little time to say what we had to, but she was just looking at me.

  “I didn’t want to do this, Shan, but you don’t want to be with me without Raj’s blessing so I had no choice. I love you,” I said and she held my hand. “I tried to stay away. I truly tried, but I can’t anymore.”

  I bit my lower lip to stop myself from crying because I couldn't let Raj see me like that.

  “Baby...this is a horrible situation, but this is not the way to go about it. How is this going to work? Every time we want to be with each other we have to share with Raj?”

  “That’s your proposal.”

  “No. My proposal is that we end this because I can’t sneak behind his back to have a relationship with you,” she said, letting go of my hand. “He is a good man. He has done nothing but bends to my every need and desire. I can’t do this to him.”

  I sat up and hung my head. I understood every word she said, and I had a choice. I could either live without Shannon or join their marriage. If I did that, I would not be able to live the dream I had when I was in Florence holding those babies. I would never have the family I wanted because I would have to give it all up to be with the love of my life. I wished I had never met Shannon, then I wouldn’t have known love, and I wouldn’t have known heartbreak.

  “I can’t live without you, Shannon…,” I sighed, “so I have to do whatever it takes to be with you.”

  “Arien, I don’t know how…”

  “When this is over, I want us to talk about polyamory.”

  “What?”

  “This way the three of us can be together without the guilt. No one else; just the three of us.”

  “Then he gets to fuck you whenever he wants,” she said with disbelief that I could even suggest that.

  “It’s the only way. Unless you have a better idea.”

  I held my breath for her to come up with a better plan because the only one I had sucked, but she had none. It was the only way.

  “Fuck!”

  Shannon started pacing the floor, then suddenly the door opened and Raj walked out in a robe with three glasses of champagne in his hands.

  “You’re still dressed?” he laughed. “We’re slow to action today.”

  Shannon took two glasses from his hand and gave one to me. I downed the liquid in one gulp, hoping it would calm my racing thoughts and the erratic beat of my heart. I looked at Raj and saw his cock bulging under the robe. He was ready for action and it made me wonder if the plan was to do it in the sunroom. Shannon sat beside me and brushed my hair from my face, her smile reassuring me that it would be OK. Maybe she was coming around to the idea of the three of us being in a consensual relationship.

  Shannon lowered her head and brushed her lips against mine, then took a sip of her champagne and shared it with me. Her cold, wet lips ravaged mine and I was lost in her. I longed to feel her against me and the rush I got from this intimacy with her made me feel like I made the right decision. I had not had sex in a long time and my body was reminded of all the pleasure it had missed. My overactive sex drive and my love for Shannon, sent me over the edge and I pulled her towel apart and grabbed her breast.

  “Fuck,” she whispered in my mouth and her hand pulled my shirt from my pants.

  I interrupted her intentions and broke our kiss so that I could get her breast into my mouth. With her nipple on my tongue, ripples of passion took over my body that I had to bring my fingers to my clit. Shannon realized and pulled my hand away and brought them above my head then climbed up to my face.

  “Oh yes,” I heard Raj’s voice. “This is what I love to see.”

  My mind and body rejected the intrusion, but when Shannon lowered her pussy onto my lips, everything else was forgotten. I could hear her cries because she seemed so eager for me to make her cum that she could not wait for my clothes to be removed. Her wet pussy moved over my lips and my tongue came out to enjoy all that she was giving. The aroma of her passion took over my senses and nothing else mattered, including the fact that Raj did not belong here. I no longer cared if he fucked us because I had slipped so deep into the abyss of wild sexual excitement that nothing could pull me out.

  Shannon had leaned forward over my face that I could not see what she was doing, but her muffled cries told me that Raj’s cock was inside her mouth. It did not matter. I grabbed her ass and molded her flesh as I ravaged her pussy. I could hear my own moans as pleasure soared between my legs. I needed Shannon there, and I knew she would be in danger of suffocation when she made the mistake of eating my pussy because I was so revved up for this orgasm that was lurking at the surface that I could not guarantee her safety.

  Shannon’s voice was now free, so Raj must have pulled her cock out of her mouth. Seconds later, I could feel him pulling down my pants that I was dressed in for the office. It wasn’t Raj I needed there, but I was throbbing and so hot that I would welcome his cock inside me, fucking me with all the power he had.

  “I’m going to fucking cum on your face. Don’t stop fucking...don’t...oh shit!” Shannon cried as she worked her hips as fast as she could to get the cum out of her. I was ready. “Arieeeeeeen! Fuuuuuuuuck!”

  Her hips stopped moving as she crushed my head between her legs. Her body violently trembled and her pussy pulsated as she released in my mouth. I could feel the love pouring from her into me, and my body and heart accepted it. I felt the tears slide down the side of my face and the finger that was inside me was no longer welcomed. I could feel my desires slowly slipping away because I needed only Shannon to touch me. It sucked that I would have to pretend and endure this fucked up mess in order to be with her, but I had no choice. This was the only option I had.

  Shannon’s orgasm came to an end and Raj’s settle between my legs to eat me. I wanted to tell him no, but I couldn’t ruin everything, so I reminded myself that he had been one of my sex partners for the past three years and we had done this before. Shannon was fine with him fucking me so there was nothing that should deter me from going through with this. Shannon got off my face and came to me. She cupped my face and wiped the tears from the corner of my eyes. I could see her confusion because she was not sure if it was from her being too rough or if I was unhappy with the situation. She must have decided that it was the former and kissed and cleaned my lips with her tongue.

  I felt Raj suck my clit into his mouth and I grabbed onto Shannon from the sudden shock of pleasure. She pulled away from my lips and looked into my eyes...then slowly hers closed. It was then I knew that it was killing her that Raj was touching me. She didn’t want to look and kept the back of her head turned to him. My mind and body were in turmoil because I was torn between pleasure and sorrow.

  Raj climbed up between us and that forced Shannon to move away. I could feel his rock-hard cock pressing against my leg. A wave of pleasure ran across the bottom of my belly and my pussy came back to life, then I looked over at Shannon and the pain on her face cause that feeling to be short-lived.

  Raj wrapped his arm around Shannon and brought her close as he kissed me then he went down to my breasts that were exposed from my opened shirt and bra. Shannon closed her eyes then opened them quickly to blink away the tears, but Raj saw.

  “Hey...baby,” he said and brought one hand to the side of her face. “Are you OK?”

  “Yes...yes...of course,” she gave him a weak smile.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes. I’m sure.”

  He kissed her and she returned the kiss. It was my time to be heartbroken. My heart was racing from a mixture of anger and fear. I would have to lay here and let Raj fuck me while the love of my life looked on. I would eventually start enjoying the feeling of him inside me, but what would that do to Shannon?

  “Come on, baby. Watch me fuck her,” Raj said because clearly that was what they were used to. “Go look.”<
br />
  Shannon stood up and Raj took hold of his cock to guide it inside my pussy.

  “No!” I heard Shannon screamed and I knew we were fucked. Nothing good could come after this. “Get off her!”

  Shannon dragged Raj off me and he stood before his wife with his long hard cock pointing toward her.

  “Wha...what’s...what’s wrong?” he asked, trying to touch her but Shannon pushed him away.

  “You should never have brought her into our home,” she cried. “This is all your fault, Raj. You should not have brought her into our lives.”

  I sat up and re-snapped my bra then buttoned my shirt as Raj stood looking at Shannon, his dick deflating from the confusion.

  “I don’t understand, Shannon. We were having a good time. You let her…”

  “I know what I did!”

  “Then what is the problem?”

  Shannon walked away and wrapped a towel around her then sat on a chair with her face in her hands and she cried. I walked over and knelt before her then took her hands from her face.

  “You shouldn’t have come,” she said, and I wanted her to stop talking before Raj figured out what was happening.

  “Just get into bed, and I will leave. You don’t need to discuss how you're feeling until…,” I said, but unable to complete what I wanted to say out of fear that I would give too much away, but hoping Shannon would understand.

  “Arien, I can’t…”

  “It’s OK,” I cut her off quickly because I did not want her to say the wrong thing then blame me for ruining her marriage. “Raj, can you walk me to my car?”

  “Wait. Shannon, what’s…”

  “Raj, clearly she is not ready to talk. Give her a moment to think about what is bothering her and when she is thinking rationally, she will talk,” I said trying to get him away from her so she could gather her thoughts.

  I needed to leave because as long as I was there, we ran the risk of her spilling her guts about us, and just like that, her marriage would be over. That would be good news for me because my arms were wide open to receive her, but that was not what she wanted.

  “OK,” Raj said and stepped away from his wife.

  I hugged her and was happy that she didn’t return it because I did not want Raj to notice the difficulty in us breaking away.

  “Keep your fucking mouth shut until we talk this through,” I warned in her ear then pulled away and took Raj’s hand so he could walk me to my car.

  As I walked farther away from Shannon, I fought the tears that were so close to spilling, and I prayed for the privacy of my car so I could free the pain inside me.

  “I’m really sorry about this, Arien. I don’t know what has been going on with her lately. We have done this for most of our marriage, and I’m surprised she doesn’t want to do this anymore,” he said as we exited the house. “But what does she mean about bringing you into our lives? She seems to be having an issue with you.”

  He stopped, and the lawyer in him was starting to put the pieces together.

  “Raj, give Shannon some time to process what is clearly a change happening inside then she will be better able to explain what is going on. You can’t just speculate and not wait to hear what she has to say,” I said, knowing it was a bunch of bull that no one could understand, including me.

  “Is she jealous of you and me? Does she think we are still seeing each other behind her back?”

  “Raj, what did I just say to you about speculating?” I asked but not waiting for him to reply. “She will talk to you. I have to go.”

  I walked away from Raj as fast as I could, leaving some of the mess behind and taking the rest with me. This was the worst possible idea I could have had, and there was nothing in my brain that tried to stop me because I was fixated on seeing Shannon, and that was all I could see. What the hell had I done?

  I entered my car and reversed out of the driveway. Once I was on the main road, I opened my mouth and allowed the pain inside to come out in the loudest scream. I was absolutely shattered. All the pain and anger that had brewed from the moment Raj joined our lovemaking to seeing the devastation on Shannon’s face, came out in my cries. I had to pull over to the side of the road because I could no longer see from the tears that had blinded me.

  In my effort to get a moment with Shannon, I ended up losing her forever. It was clear that I had to move on, and I had no idea how I was going to do that. I had thought that we could have a polyamorous relationship where no one had to be left out or get hurt, but it was clear that it could not happen because I did not want to watch him touch her, and she would not want to watch him touch me.

  I took deep breaths and wiped my eyes. It was time to pull up my big-girl panties and understand that this was life. Things happen, and we move on. I fell in love with the wrong person and now it was time to look for love in another direction. I should not be too hard on myself because this was my first time at love, but it would certainly not be the last.

  Chapter 14

  It had been a week since I heard from Shannon or Raj, and I could only assume that she came clean with him about how she felt about me, and they decided to ride out this rough spot in their marriage and move on. I could not imagine that Raj would not know by now that Shannon was in love with me after her reaction in the sunroom and the things she said. Raj had already zeroed in and knew Shannon’s many recent issues had something to do with me. She told him that it was all his fault because he had brought me into their lives.

  I spent many hours in each day wondering how their conversation went and what resolution they came to why neither of them had contacted me or why Shannon had not accepted any of my calls. After the third day, I got the message and had stopped calling. Instead, I threw myself into learning how my father’s company operated. I had one hundred percent grasp on the financial health of the business and what I needed to maintain and what I needed to improve, however, biotechnology was proving to be above my mental capacity. It was not all a waste to be at it every day because I learned something, but not much.

  Lynn had been spending a lot of time at my office and she had become friends with my secretary because there was a clash with the responsibilities, mostly scheduling, and they had to work together to figure it out. Lynn was most useful at the office because I no longer had a personal life, so the only things she had to do were the ordering of groceries, salon appointments, dry cleaning payments, canceling of invitations, things of that nature. At work, it took some of the burden off Elise because I would not disturb her work with things that Lynn could do like taking a signed document to my father.

  I was just closing the lid of my laptop to leave for the day when I heard a knock on my door. Whoever it was, did not wait to be invited in because the handle of the door started to turn.

  “Hello, darling,” my mother said and walked briskly to my desk and sat across from me. “I’m so happy I caught you before you left for the day.”

  “Hi, Mom. What brings you to my office when your husband’s is down the hallway?” I said sitting back in my chair and bracing for the shit she usually brought.

  “I came to see you, and to bring your father home with me. He is working longer and harder since you started and that does not make sense.”

  “He's getting me ready to take over one day. You should be applauding that.”

  “I am, but he is an old man and should be home in time for dinner.”

  “Well, your decision to have a child late in life has backfired,” I pointed out.

  “Arien…”

  “Why are you here, Mom?” I asked quickly to cut off the topic of motherhood because I lived most of my adult years hearing about that from her.

  She had stopped for a while now because she realized that it was not going to happen. She had no idea that I wanted a baby more than anything in this world...maybe a little less than I wanted Shannon.

  “I'm here because I'm worried about you.”

  “Worried why?”

  “I know some
thing significant has caused you to make such a drastic change in your life, and while I'm the happiest I have been in a long time, I'm worried about the cause of the change. I tried to speak to your doctor but they won’t give me any information about your health,” my mom said and I would have laughed if she didn’t look so serious. “Were you diagnosed with a terminal illness? Did you get HIV from those reckless parties you…?”

  “Mom! You need to stop,” I said getting up from my desk and walking over to the fridge to get a drink.

  “I just want to know if you are OK.”

  “Medically, I'm fine. Emotionally not so much, but I will be OK.”

  “I knew it! It’s a man!” she said pointing at me and getting to her feet.

  “You didn’t know anything because you thought I had HIV. Mom, I need to get home to try and have an early night. I have a big meeting tomorrow with all the execs. Some are actually flying in, so I can’t tell them I overslept,” I said as I walked to the door.

  “Why are you keeping secrets from your mother?” she asked, walking behind me.

  “Bye, Mom,” I said and opened the door to my secretary’s office.

  “Excuse me, Miss Todd,” Elise said as I was walking by. “Mr. Bolton’s secretary called to say that he has a family emergency and would not be at the meeting tomorrow, but he will send a representative.”

  “A representative won’t do. Tell him to tend to his family emergency and as soon as he is able to, I would like to meet with him directly,” I said and could not avoid looking at how beautiful she was. It got me every time.

  Shannon was in a whole different league and it was not fair to compare anyone to her because they did not stand a chance. It didn’t mean others were not beautiful, they just weren’t as beautiful as my Shannon.

  “OK, Miss Todd. I will make sure he gets this message.”

  “Thank you. See you tomorrow,” I said and left the office with my mother in tow.

  “Darling, why don’t you have dinner with us?” my mother said.

  “I have dinner at home, and I would like to eat closer to my bed,” I replied then turned to her just outside my father’s office. “Good to see you, Mom.”